Chapter 1
Emma Shepard was just an ordinary eight year old girl. Her hair was black and her eyes were blue. She liked dolls, things that were pink, and spending time with her friends. Ordinary doesn’t do justice to just how ordinary Emma was. However, that was all going to change at the end of the week. Because at that point she would become an ordinary nine year old girl.
Emma lived with her parents and her little sister Josie in a place called Harmony Hills. It was a small town, like one from a picture book, with a firehouse, a police station, a school, and a park. Harmony Hills was the sort of place where everyone knew just about everyone else.
It was the end of summer, a week before Emma’s birthday party. She always woke up bright and early, even on weekends. Emma hated wasting her day away in bed, and knew that breakfast was the most important meal of the day.
Emma had just a week before her big birthday party, and so the invitations had to go out today. Harmony Hills was a small enough town that most of her friends could be reached on foot.
As Emma was getting dressed, there was a knock on her bedroom door.
“Come in,” she said. She was mostly dressed, and finished buttoning up her shorts as her mother entered.
“Morning, Em,” Anne Shepard said. “I finished these for you after you went to bed.” She handed her daughter a bundle of sealed envelopes.
Emma took them and said, “Thanks. I was gonna head out with them after breakfast.”
“That’s fine,” her mother said. “Just don’t stay out too long.” She headed to the door and, just before she left, added, “Breakfast will be done in a sec.”
Emma sorted through her envelopes and ensured that there was one for each friend. Even with the free time that summer offers, there were few times that Emma and all of her friends could be together. It was nice that they’d all be together one last time before school started.
* * *
Emma walked out her front door, down the driveway, and onto the sidewalk. Heading to the right, Emma passed one house and walked up to her first stop, the home of the French family.
Lilly French was always quick to assure new acquaintances that French was her last name, not what type of person she was. She had brown hair and was just slightly chubbier than the rest of her friends. Lilly liked chocolate.
Lilly took the invitation with a huge smile. “Do you have one for Nick too?” she asked. Nick was Lilly’s brother, her twin and virtually a male copy of her, although the two insisted that they were nothing alike, and didn’t seem to get along.
Emma shook her head and smiled, “Girls only.” The boys of the neighborhood usually kept to themselves, and the girls were fine with that.
“What kind of cake are you having?” Lilly asked, hoping the answer was chocolate.
“It’s a surprise,” Emma winked as she took off.
Emma passed another house and made her way to a front door that she wasn’t exactly looking forward to. Emma and her sister weren’t the only little Shepards in Harmony Hills. Her cousin Abigail lived in the biggest house in the neighborhood. Emma didn’t exactly want to invite her to the party, but her parents insisted. She answered the door the way she had spent her entire life; in a nice dress with big, blond curls.
“Oh... It’s you,” Abigail said. She would frequently come off as spoiled, vain, conceited, bossy, selfish, self-righteous, arrogant, obnoxious, and mean. Abigail was constantly out to get Emma and her friends.
Emma responded with a not too expressive, “Good morning, Abigail.”
“So, what can I do for you today?” the princess asked.
Emma sighed and handed Abigail her invitation. “Would you please come to my party next week?”
“A party? With you and your little friends? I’m sorry Emma, but I’m going to be in the sixth grade this year. I can’t risk being seen with you and your juvenile friends.”
Emma took a deep breath, then said, “Great,” as she turned and walked away.
Abigail was taken aback. “Wha... Great? What does that mean?” Abigail watched as Emma ran off, and simply went back into her own home.
Emma didn’t have time to deal with her cousin. She wrapped around the cul-de-sac to the end of the neighborhood, where the last house on her journey sat.
The Gaines family was home to Penny, Emma’s best friend. Emma had fond memories from her early childhood; jumping on Penny’s trampoline, playing hide and seek in their massive basement, and dressing up in Penny’s mother’s old clothes.
However, as Emma walked along the driveway, she found herself remembering something she hadn’t thought about in a while.
As Penny was a year older than Emma, she was always a grade ahead of her and her friends. On the day Penny came home from her first day of kindergarten, she went over to Emma’s house to play. Penny acted so proud about going to real school, but seemingly killed any reason she had to boast by announcing that she also got to wear Pull-Ups that day.
Emma was dumbfounded. Penny acted like she was so lucky, and actually let everyone see her Pull-Up. Emma was rather confused, Pull-Ups were worn by toddlers. Penny was almost six! Even Josie, who was two at the time, didn’t wear them.
Looking back, it made a lot of sense. Penny had all sorts of problems when it came to the bathroom. She’d wet herself whenever they would play together and wore Pull-Ups whenever Emma slept over. When Penny was seven, Emma even saw a package of Pull-Ups on top of her dresser.
Eventually Emma stopped noticing these things, and briefly found herself looking for them. Growing up with Penny caused a bit of fascination about the topic for Emma. She had always been interested in exactly why Penny had those problems, and even wanted to try a Pull-Up on.
However, given how embarrassed Penny was about everything, Emma was always afraid to even bring it up. Emma was even too afraid to actually go through with it. She knew it was weird and just accepted it as a little weird thing about herself that she gradually forgot as she grew up.
Ignoring the bizarre memories of Pull-Ups , Emma ran the last few steps to the front door, where she found Mimi.
“Oh, hi, Emma,” Mimi said when she answered the door at.
“Hi, Mimi,” Emma said as she gathered the envelopes. “I have invitations for you and Penny for my birthday party. It’s next week.”
“Oh, wow!” Mimi said, “That’s cool. I’m sure Penny will be very excited.”
“Where is she, anyway?” Emma asked.
“I have absolutely no idea!” Mimi smiled.
Emma paused, expecting Mimi to go looking for Penny, or at least call her name. After a second of nothing, Emma gave up. “Well... See you then,” Emma waved as she stepped off the porch and headed toward the sidewalk.
Mimi was Penny’s sister, adopted from Japan at age two. She was very outgoing and eccentric. Unlike Penny, Mimi was the same age as Emma and everyone else in their group; another reason why Penny often associated with their class instead of her own.
Having made a complete circle of the neighborhood, Emma headed towards the mailbox at the end of the street. The rest of her friends were more than a short walk away, and would have to find out about the party by mail.
Heading home, Emma noticed that the “For Sale” sign on the house next door to her’s had a “Sold” banner taped over it. Emma shrugged.
It was nice out, and since summer was ending, she decided to turn around and circle back around the neighborhood before heading home. It wouldn’t be this nice forever.
Chapter 2
Emma burst through the front door and headed toward the nearest bathroom. Her orange juice from breakfast had pumped her full of Vitamin C, which was now looking for a way out. She had started to think that walking slowly and enjoying the sunny day might have been a bad idea.
But Emma had made it to the bathroom, not that there was a chance she wouldn’t. She hadn’t had an accident since she was in Kindergarten, and was able to hold it very very long periods of time. However, now that she had Penny’s past on the brain, Emma wondered what would happen if she wet herself at her age.
The last time that happened, it was the end of the school day, and she really had to go. For whatever reason she was in the kind of mood where she wasn’t necessarily afraid to ask to go to the bathroom, but simply didn’t want to. Emma sat still in her chair and regretfully let her self pee, just to avoid the feeling of a full bladder. Her teacher just thought she had been feeling sick, since Emma wore dark pants. No one could tell what had actually happened.
When her mom came to pick her up, she uncovered Emma’s accident and spent the whole car ride home giving her a potty training refresher course. It was hardly a scolding, but was less than comforting. And that was that.
Penny probably never had that problem. She could just wet her Pull-Up everyday and no one would say a thing. That was on of the advantages, in Emma’s eyes, to wearing some sort of diaper. She’d never have to get up and miss a movie or stop playing with her friends. Honestly, Emma couldn’t think of an actual reason to even be potty trained.
“Emma?” she heard her mother call from the other side of the door. “You okay?”
“Uh... Yeah,” Emma said, realizing that she had made a show of bursting through the front door, storming to the bathroom, and had been sitting there, just thinking, for quite some time. Emma flushed.
Emma washed her hands and opened the door to her curious mother.
“I just...,” Emma struggled for an answer. “Really had to go,” she added.
Emma’s mother stared for a moment, then said, “Well. Try to be more careful.”
As her mother walked off, Emma realized she’d always be too chicken to actually wet her pants. However, the thought of it was quite exciting.
* * *
Penny stared at the blurry image in the mirror. As she put on her glasses, she was able to make out the image of her pale skin, and her pale-blond hair. Other than a few allergies, Penny wasn’t exactly a sickly child, but she definitely looked like one.
Penny stepped out of her bathroom, refreshed from her shower. She loved bathing in the shower, as it made her feel refreshed and clean.
She walked down the hall and into her bedroom, where she began to get dressed. Half of Penny’s wardrobe was pale-blue. On this, a Saturday, Penny opted to put on her play clothes; simple shorts and a T shirt, both the color of the sky.
Just as Penny was done dressing, Mimi entered and handed her an envelope with Penny’s name on it.
“What’s this?” Penny asked as she neatly opened it.
“Emma brought it over for you,” Mimi said. “I got one too.”
Penny finished opening the enveloped and discovered the invitation to Emma’s birthday party, to be held at the end of the following week.
“Oh, cool,” she said as she set it down on her nightstand.
“Mom said we have to go to the store later to get her a gift,” Mimi said before dancing out of the room.
Emma was easy to shop for, as far as Penny was concerned. Her best friend was such an ordinary little girl it was almost too easy. She’d be happy with anything girly or pink.
Penny was just the same, but at least she had her uniqueness. For example, Penny didn’t like jewelry or makeup, at least not as much as other girls. It wasn’t that weird, but it was weirder than anything Emma was into.
* * *
Emma was lying on her bed, holding up a weekly ad coupon booklet from the mail. She was looking at the small diaper ad. It was just a picture of the package and a price, nothing else.
Emma hopped up and grabbed her piggie bank. After dumping its contents out and counting, Emma realized she didn’t even come close.
Not that she would ever actually go through with it. There were so many factors to consider. How would she get to the store? What if someone saw her? How would she get them back to her room? Where would she hide them? And would she even be brave enough to put them on and use them for their purpose?
Emma chuckled and put her change away. It was just happy thinking, there was no way she’d go through it.
Emma got up, put the booklet under her bed, and headed downstairs for a snack.
Emma was finishing up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich when her mother walked into the kitchen. “Emma, can you come help me at the store. We can buy some more of your party stuff too.”
Emma nodded and went to put her shoes back on. She liked going shopping. And this time, she’d be able to see the package of diapers, which always seemed to be on sale, in real life. Passing a plastic bag on a shelf was better than nothing.
Chapter 3
Penny liked the summer. She was sad that it had to end. She liked the free time they got - three whole months to play, and gorgeous weather. Sure, the summers were very hot in Harmony Hills, but the winters were just as harsh and came quicker every year.
Both seasons reminded Penny of playing with her friends. They’d practically spent every waking summer day in someone’s backyard or hanging out in the woods. Winters were different, because they only had such little time to bundle up and play before the snow melted, but that just made their time together all the more special.
“Hello! Earth to Penny!”
Penny snapped out of her daydream, Mimi was staring right at her.
“What?” Penny asked.
“Don’t you ‘What?’ me,” Mimi said, “We were having a very important conversation and you started daydreaming. Honestly, what were you thinking about?”
“Winter time,” Penny said.
“Well that’s weird,” Mimi declared, “Anyway, what costume do you think I should wear to Emma’s party?”
Penny had clearly been daydreaming longer than she thought. “Is it a Halloween party? It’s August.”
Mimi shook her head, “No?”
“Let’s go girls,” their mother said as she walked by, carrying a few bags.
Penny and Mimi followed. They left the store where they had bought Emma a birthday gift and a few other things they needed for the house.
When they arrived at the car, Mimi pointed and said, “Hey look, it’s Emma.”
Penny and traced Mimi’s finger. Across the parking lot, Emma and her mother were just entering the store that they had left.
“HI, EMMA!” Mimi shouted as her mother rolled her eyes and covered her face with her palm.
“Let’s go girls,” their mother said, “We don’t want Emma to see her present to early, do we?”
* * *
When Emma entered the store, she took a good look around. Everything was organized into aisles, making it easy enough to find what she was looking for. However, she needed to be discrete. She couldn’t just go straight to the diaper aisle. She needed to take it slowly and at least pretend to look around. And then, there was her mother and sister.
“Grab me a cart, will you, sweetie?” Anne asked as she got a list out of her purse. Emma complied, telling herself once again that there was no way she could get a chance to spend even two seconds near the diapers. Not with them around.
They made their way through the frozen food section, the snacks section, the household wares section, and the toiletries section. Even when they stopped in the party section, Emma could care less about anything else. For some reason, all she could think about was diapers.
In less than an hour, they had walked through every aisle they needed to, which did not include the baby aisle. As they approached checkout, Emma thought their time in the store was coming to a close.
And then, as her mother got in line, she turned to Emma and said, “Emma, I forgot the bread, can you go grab a loaf?”
Just like that, her mother had given Emma free range to roam the grocery store, which the only rules being that she had to return within a reasonable time and with a loaf of bread. Candy from a baby.
Speaking of babies, the diaper section was just past the bread aisle, and both were far away enough from checkout that Emma wouldn’t be caught sneaking off to questionable areas. After she grabbed a loaf, Emma made sure there was no one watching her, and then headed into the aisle, stopping just in front of the diapers.
Looking around, Emma realized that there were a lot more options than the ones in the booklet. There were the standard baby diapers, in both the Huggies and Pampers variety, plus the generic versions. They were appealing, but Emma knew that in her realistic, yet still wildest dreams, she wouldn’t be able to fit in those. And they’d probably be difficult to put on without help from someone, like her mother. And that certainly wasn’t going to happen.
The Pull-Ups were what she really wanted, they were larger and she could slip them on and off by herself. And if second grade Penny could fit in them, why not fourth grade Emma? In addition to the generic version, there were the actual Pull-Ups, and the Pampers version, called Easy-Ups.
Both Emma and Josie were potty trained with the Huggies brand, and that’s what Penny wore for all those years. There wasn’t even a real reason to consider any other option. She’d never really heard of anyone using Easy-Ups, and only knew about them because of the commercials.
Emma squatted down in front of the Pull-Ups. They were available in three sizes. With Emma being of an the average height and weight of a soon to be nine year old girl, she assumed the largest size would be the most likely one to fit.
Just as Emma was about to reach out and actually touch a pack, a small shadow appeared around her.
“What the hell are you doing?”
Emma knew who it was right away. Only one person with a voice that sounded that young would use language like that. She turned around and looked up at her worst nightmare. Standing right above her was Abigail, her most horrible cousin.
“Hi,” she said. Emma hadn’t even considered that someone she knew might see her at the store, a grave mistake.
Abigail stared, completely and utterly confused at what she was seeing. “Planning on pooping your pants later?” she asked.
Emma struggled to find a response. At first, she thought she might just try peeing and see how she liked that. Then, she realized that wasn't exactly what Abigail had asked. She couldn’t think of a reasonable excuse to be holding a loaf of bread, in the baby aisle, crouched down, looking at a pack of toddler diapers. On a sunday.
“You know what?” Abigail interrupted her cousin’s thinking, “I don’t care. Whatever you and your weird friends do is between you and the other fourth graders.”
Abigail turned and walked away, leaving Emma with a pounding chest as she stood alone in the diaper aisle.
Emma turned right around and left the aisle as well. She tried to calm herself down. She moved towards the office supply aisle, and caught a glimpse of Abigail from afar. Her cousin was with her mother, whom she clearly hadn’t told that the two had crossed paths.
Emma took off, avoiding Abigail as she made it for the checkout. She didn’t want to be in that store for another second.
Chapter 4
“I’m going over to Penny’s,” Emma said. It was a week later, just after breakfast. Emma said goodbye to her parents and, seconds later, was across the street.
When she arrived, Emma found an unusual sight. Penny was standing with not only Mimi and Lilly, which was expected, but also Nick, Lilly’s brother, and all of the boys from the neighborhood. There was Eli, the quiet type, Zack, the pushover, and Max.
“It’ll be a great way to end the summer,” Max said, “Don’t you agree, Emma?”
Emma was just walking up to the discussion, unsure what they were talking about. “Yeah,” she said. Max was kind of cute.
“Alright then,” Nick said, “Girls versus boys. Be at the playground in ten minutes.” The boys walked off into the woods. Emma smiled as she watched Max leave. He was always so polite to her, never got in any arguments, and always...
“What was that about?!” Lilly shouted. “Do you know what you just agreed to?”
Emma looked around at her friends. Lilly was furious, Penny was afraid, and Mimi was counting clouds. That could only mean one thing.
“Kickball,” Nick said ten minutes later. The eight stood on at the playground, which was mostly a massive grass field surrounded by a swingset and the like. “Classic rules, six innings, first to twenty-one, no fouls.”
Emma wished Rena was there to explain how wrong those rules were. Rena was the sportiest of their friends, and was tough enough to stand up to the boys whenever they come around, demanding to prove their manliness.
But Emma really couldn’t care. She was out with her friends, and didn’t mind getting to see Max.
“Hey, Emma?” Penny asked, “Are you excited to be in fourth grade now?”
Emma smiled, then nodded. “Long division and geography, right? I’m so scared I’m peeing in my pants any minute now.”
“Uhm, yeah,” Penny said, “And since you’ll be the oldest in the grade school, you get to do all kinds of stuff. It’s weird that you go from that to being the youngest at the middle school, but I think I’ll get by. Abigail says the real middle school part of middle school doesn’t start until sixth grade, but I think that’s just Abigail being Abigail, you know?”
Emma smiled, then nodded, her ear successfully talked off. They both turned to Lilly, who was arguing with Nick about his bullcrap rules. It took a while, but eventually they actually started playing.
It ended up being a nice way to end the summer. It was warm out, and Emma loved just being out and active. She was only slight interested in the actual game, but it was enjoyable enough.
After they all grew tired of the game, Lilly and Nick argued over who won, with everyone else relaxing around the playground.
Emma was sitting on the swings, just floating in place, while Mimi swung next to her, trying to go high enough to loop the swing set bar. After finally letting go and jumping off, Mimi landed on the ground and immediately found some grass to examine.
Giggling at Mimi’s antics, Emma was distracted to see that Max had actually sat down next to her.
“Hi,” he said.
Emma blushed, and turned silent.
“Fourth grade next week,” he said, “Nervous?”
Emma shook her head.
“Hey, Emma,” he continued, “Isn’t it your birthday soon?”
Emma nodded.
“Well,” he smiled, “Happy birthday.”
Emma had just built up enough courage to say something when she realized that she had never had to pee so bad in all of her life.
“I’ll be right back,” she said. She leapt of her swing, ignoring Max’s calls, and headed into the woods that separated the playground from their neighborhood. When she well out of their sight, she turned around and confirmed that no one was following her.
Chapter 5
Emma ran deep into the woods. She couldn’t believe that she had actually waited this long. Peeing outside wasn’t exactly her sort of thing, but it was her only option at the moment.
Looking around, Emma couldn’t exactly find a good place to squat - but then, she had a more interesting idea.
Emma was wearing a skirt, so if she stood still and simply wet her panties, nobody would be able to tell. Emma had been longing to try something of the sort.
She stood still. Emma composed herself when she decided that she was going through with it. She ensured that her skirt would not be damaged, and prepared to let go.
After spending seven years sitting down to pee, Emma found it difficult to just do it in her pants. She closed her eyes and envisioned herself sitting on a toilet, and then decided it was more fun to pretend she was in a diaper. Once that image was in her head, Emma began to feel a strange warmth spreading through her underwear.
Emma’s heart was racing. She could not believe what she was doing. Not since she was in Kindergarten had she done something like that, and certainly never on purpose.
Unfortunately, the thrill began to end when Emma realized that she really, really had to go. Her panties overflowed rather quickly, and she soon felt thing streams trickling down her legs and collecting in her now warm and wet socks.
Then, Emma heard a twig snap. Her eyes widened and she turned right around, instinctively forcing her hands between her legs.
Nick was standing behind her, far away enough that we couldn’t see the wetness in her socks, but close enough that he saw the newly formed wet spot on Emma’s skirt, that continued to grow as she held her hands there.
Emma traced Nick’s eyes down to her skirt, once spotless, now soaked in the front as her hands filled with the last of her emptying bladder.
She moved her hands. Nick stood still.
A voice, Penny’s, called out, “Emma!” and she realized that the other kids had been calling her name the entire time she had been wetting herself.
Emma looked at Nick and mouthed the word, “Please,” begging him to say nothing. Emma was dumb for even trying.
“She’s over here!” Nick shouted, “She peed her pants!”
With that, Emma took off, running in the opposite direction, toward her house. Being caught by her friends was far worse than being scolded by her mother in private.
And the thought of her mother filled Emma with fear and dread. She hadn’t thought any of this through. How did she think she was she ever going to get away with this? And what would happen when she got home? If she managed to avoid her parents, she would have to wash her clothes, by hand, in the bathroom sink, or simply throw them away.
Emma could hear Nick shouting for the others as he ran back. Tears began to roll down her eyes when she realized there was no way out of this. She would forever be the eight year old girl who peed in her pants the week of her ninth birthday.
Making it back to her front door without being seen, Emma felt somewhat lucky. She dodged one bullet, but was now walking into a whole firing range.
Emma slowly opened her door and closed it behind her. She then took extra caution heading upstairs, avoiding the steps that she knew would creak. As she made it upstairs, Emma thought she was home free. But then her world fell apart.
“Back so soon?” Emma heard her mother ask.
Stopping dead in her tracks, Emma’s heart was racing again. She was just outside of her bedroom, facing the door, as she heard her mother walk up behind her.
“You have fun?” her mother asked.
“Yeah” Emma said, “We played kickball with the boys.”
“That’s nice. Hey,” Anne reached out, “What are you hiding over there,” She placed her hand on her daughter’s shoulder and began to turn her around.
“Mom, no!” Emma’s shout rang throughout the house. She stood there, perfectly still, her shame on display for the world.
“Emma, sweetie, what happened?” Anne wasn’t in the mood to shout. There was no need to, she saw her daughters tears and knew she felt bad enough as it was.
“I just,” Emma started, “Held it for too long. I didn’t want to stop playing and I just forgot about it.”
As her daughter broke down into complete sobbing, Anne dropped to her knees and gave her a hug. “It’s okay,” she said, “These things happen.”
Anne led Emma into the bathroom, where her daughter’s crying had finally slowed down. She helped her out of her skirt and underwear, and then set the wet clothes aside.
As Emma stood there, naked from the waist down, she couldn’t help but feel like a complete baby. Josie never had accidents. She never even wet her bed. And here she was, the older sister, staring at her soiled clothes, waiting to be cleaned.
Even though her “accident” was in fact intentional, the fact that she was caught by Nick and now had to endure her mother took away any fun she might have had.
Emma’s mom started to run a bath, felt the water warm up, then switched it to a shower. Emma’s heart sank.
“Jump in,” her mother said, grabbing Emma’s wet clothes, “I’ll throw these in the wash and we won't have to tell your dad about this.”
With that, Emma was alone in the bathroom. She closed the door, then locked it. She then looked at the shower. Water shot out of the showerhead just as shame had shot out of her body.
Emma had never taken a shower before. Even at eight, almost nine, she had always taken a bath, often sharing one with her sister. Nothing was said about it between her and her mother. It was Emma’s first shower, and she’d never take a normal bath again.
Emma was far from happy. Wetting herself was nothing like what she thought it would be. It was messy, smelly, uncomfortable, embarrassing, and traumatic. She swore to herself that she would never try somthing like that again.
Chapter 6
Emma lay awake in her bed. Fresh from her new shower, she wanted to go to bed. Sure, it was barely lunch time yet, but Emma wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. Her life was over. Fourth grade was about to become a year of misery, torment, and shame. She sat up, decided to go downstairs and ask her mother to transfer schools.
Just then, Emma’s mother entered. “Hey, sweetie,” she said, “Feeling better?” Emma nodded. “I know how you’re probably feeling, but it’s best to just put these things behind us and forget all about them.”
“I guess,” Emma agreed.
“And besides,” her mother added, “I need you to run an errand for me.”
“What?”
“I need you to pick up something from Abigail’s house.”
Emma groaned. She would rather pee her pants in front of the whole school before she ever saw Abigail again.
“And wear your jacket, it’s getting chilly out there.”
Summer was over. Emma’s life was becoming filled with disappointment after disappointment.
* * *
Emma practically ran down the street toward her cousin’s house. While she was dreading being near her cousin, the less time she spent roaming her neighborhood the better. If someone from the kickball game spotted her, she would literally die.
Emma arrived at Abigail’s house, and pressed the doorbell three times.
“Back with more invitations?” Abigail asked, “Honestly, Emma you have got to take a hint; nobody wants to be your friend.”
Emma ignored her cousin’s attempt at an insult, wanting to end their visit as soon as possible. Before she had to say anything, the two were joined by Abigail’s mom, Emma’s aunt Debra.
“Emma,” she said, “Thanks for coming. We just couldn’t get out of the house and your mother was very insistent.”
Emma smiled, unsure as to exactly what she was there for.
“Well, come on in,” aunt Debra said. She led Emma into the kitchen where some woman was drinking coffee. Emma vaguely recognized her.
“Emma, you remember my sister, Gina, from Christmas?” aunt Debra asked. “She’s staying with us for a few nights.”
“Hello, sweetie,” the woman said, “You’re growing up into a lovely young lady.”
Emma smiled and thanked Gina, who turned around to Abigail and asked, “Honey, would you go check on Kathleen for me? I think she’s playing in the other room.”
Abigail ran off, and Debra said, “Let me go get that for you.”
Debra headed down to the basement. On the way, Abigail passed her by, holding Kathleen by the hand. Kathleen, now more of a toddler than the baby that Emma remembered, whispered something to her mother. As Gina scooped her up and took her into the bathroom. Abigail quickly vanished.
Emma waited a minute, and aunt Debra had still not returned. She felt herself needing to pee, and was intent on not having another accident, especially at Abigail’s house. As Gina was still in the downstairs bathroom, Emma made her way upstairs.
As she was finishing up on the toilet, Emma looked around. And her eyes widened. In a corner of the room was an opened package of Pull-Ups. Little Kathleen must be going through potty training, hence the Pull-Ups.
Not surprisingly, Emma found herself less interested in that specific detail. Someone the appropriate age wearing a diaper wasn’t exactly all that fascinating. However, Emma realized something else.
She crept over to package took a peek inside. It was half full, Gina probably won’t notice if one or two went missing.
As she heard the voices of her aunt calling her from downstairs, Emma quickly grabbed two Pull-Ups and shoved them in her jacket and ran down stairs.
“Here you go,” Debra said, handing Emma a brown paper bag. Emma took it, and then said, “Well, I better hurry back,” in reference more to her recent theft and less to her mother’s need for this random brown bag.
Emma added a “Goodbye,” and left with a smile.
Chapter 7
Emma raced home. Not because she was afraid of being caught. She had in fact completely forgotten about her half-accident earlier and was now more excited by the prospect of the Pull-Ups hidden in her jacket. She was excited, finally feeling victorious.
When Emma got home, she ran straight upstairs and into her room. There, she pulled out the Pull-Ups and set them on her bed. She stared at them with glee.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door, which startled Emma. She shoved the Pull-Ups under her pillow just as her mom entered the room.
Emma’s confused mom grabbed the brown bag off Emma’s bed.
“Oh, sorry,” Emma said, “I ran upstairs before I could give that to you.” She looked for a reason, then added, “It’s cold out.”
Anne shrugged, and pulled a carton of baking soda out of the bag. “Now I can finally start work on those cookies you want for the party.” Emma’s mother left.
For a second, Emma wondered why her aunt Debra needed baking soda. She assumed she was probably baking. Or something. It didn’t matter anymore. Nothing else mattered.
Emma had diapers.
* * *
“Wow,” Emma’s father said, “You must have been really hungry.”
Emma was eating her dinner as quickly as possible. With her evening bath replaced by her earlier shower, the next step on Emma’s agenda was to put on her pajamas. She usually went for a standard nightgown. But tonight, her wardrobe was to be expanded.
Emma decided against dessert and headed upstairs, where she locked her door, just to be safe, and then pulled her pajamas from her drawers, where she also hid the diapers after the close call earlier.
Emma undressed and put on her pink, princess-decorated nighty. It was a remnant of her childhood. Something that barely fit her anymore. It would probably pass to Josie soon, or just go to charity. It made Emma look four years younger. Appropriate attire for the occasion.
As she stood naked under her nighty, Emma stared at the Pull-Ups. One of them had Cinderella on it, the other had a trio of Princesses that Emma was less familiar with. After composing herself, Emma picked up Cinderella, and put it on.
* * *
Penny woke up. It was the day of Emma’s party. She followed her typical morning routine, undressing, showering, getting ready for the day, and then heading downstairs. After the usual morning conversations with her parents, Penny had her breakfast. Afterwards, she simply needed to find something to entertain herself until the party.
* * *
Lilly woke up. It was the day of Emma’s party. She followed her typical morning routine, heading straight downstairs in what barely counted as pajamas, plopping in front of the TV, and absorbing hours of cartoons. When there was nothing interesting on anymore, Lilly grabbed some breakfast. Afterwards, she plopped back in front of the TV. She spent the day like that, watching cartoons in her sleep clothes until the party.
* * *
Mimi woke up. It was the day of Emma’s party. She followed her typical morning routine, laying in bed and trying to get as much sleep as possible. After her bed became less comfortable and she grew restless, she slogged downstairs for some breakfast. Afterwards, she was full of energy and bounced all over the house. Penny was certainly entertained. The two spent the day together, waiting until the party.
* * *
Emma woke up. It was the day of her party. After slowly stretching her muscles, she realized that she’d have to adjust her morning routine. Beneath her nightgown was a Pull-Up, for the first time since she could remember.
She certainly enjoyed the feeling of wearing it, but Emma was way too afraid to actually pee in it. She had already come home with wet pants, and there was no way she could explain a wet diaper.
After a few minutes of enjoying the feeling, Emma got out of bed and undressed. She was careful not to split the tabs, or else she wouldn’t be able to wear it again.
She then moved to hide it with the other one. Instantly, she noticed the difference. The one in the drawer was still stiff, while the one she had worn was loose and stretched out. This was probably because they were meant for two year old Kathleen. Emma would have to get as much use out of it as possible in a few nights before it started to fall apart.
Emma dressed and went downstairs, where she found her parents setting up the party. She offered to help, but mostly stayed out of the way. When the time came, she went back upstairs and put on some nicer clothes.
After the sun went down, the doorbell rang. Emma went to answer it, stil in a good mood from her night in diapers and the coming festivities. As soon as she opened the door, her world came crashing down.
Her first guest was Abigail.
Chapter 8
Abigail arrived with her parents. In the presence of adults, Emma’s cousin was ultra-fake nice. After standard birthday party pleasantries, the two kids were left alone.
“Just so you know,” Abigail said, “I only came because my parents made me. So... Here” Abigail shoved a present in Emma’s hand.
“Thanks a lot,” Emma said, walking the present to the table. The two then stood in an awkward silence, Abigail was suspiciously out of ammo. Emma inferred that she really must not want to be here.
The rest of the guests arrived shortly after that. First Penny and Mimi, and then Lily. They talked for a bit, and Emma forgot all about Abigail.
Emma was suddenly reminded that this was her first time seeing her friends since she ran off at the kickball game. Something she’d completely forgotten about.
“So where did you go?” Mimi asked.
“Nick said you peed your pants,” Lilly said.
“Is it true?” Mimi asked.
“Yeah, is it true?” Lilly asked.
“Hi, Emma,” Penny said, softly.
Emma had them all quite down. Her father and more importantly Abigail had no idea about the accident, and she wanted to ensure that no one ever found out. Including her friends.
“Of course not,” Emma said, “I just remembered that my mom needed help buying stuff for the party and I didn’t have time to say goodbye.”
They stared at her for a second, and then found other things to worry about.
“Where’s the food?” Mimi asked.
“Do you have any chocolate?” Lilly asked.
The party went on. More friends came. There was Rena, who was on every sports team. Izzy, who was incredibly nice. And lastly there was Nicole, a girl with dark skin that sticks out at any major gathering in Harmony Hills..
“Princess is here, huh?” Nicole asked when she spotted the tell-tale high heels of a wannabe teenage drama queen.
“Come on, Nicole,” Rena said, “You’re both into dance and other girly stuff. I bet you’ll spend the rest of your lives together.”
“If I’m ever her friend, promise you’ll kill me,” Nicole demanded.
Everyone laughed, until Abigail walked by.
“What on earth is so funny?” she asked. Everyone stared in silent fear, except Nicole who stepped forward.
“Just you and your fat legs,” Nicole said.
Abigail’s jaw dropped, and she stormed off.
“You’ll have to tell me how you do that someday,” Emma said.
* * *
The party went on. They played games, ate cake, and had fun. As everything was winding down, the girls found themselves outside, in the dark, catching lightning bugs.
While Izzy and Mimi were running all over the place, Emma found herself just sitting on the back porch with Penny, looking up at the sky.
“Did you have a good party?” Penny asked.
Emma nodded. “Thanks for coming, she said.
“Is something wrong?” Penny asked.
Emma smirked. She was glad that her best friend always knew what was up. “What’s fourth grade really like?” she asked.
“It’s exactly like third grade,” Penny said. “But the school work is slightly harder and on Wednesdays you get three tacos instead of two.”
Emma giggled. “Thanks.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Penny added, “Fourth grade is just the next step in growing up.”
“What if I don’t want to grow up?” Emma asked, “What if I want to be a little kid forever, or even be a baby again?”
“What are you saying?” Penny was worried by her friends words, until Emma looked up and smiled.
“Just kidding!” Emma giggled. She grabbed her friend by the hand and ran to play with the others.
But Emma was not kidding. She truly did not want to grow up. She wanted to stay little forever, maybe even littler than she already was. All she knew was that she was going to fight it as long as she could. Next year, she didn’t even want to have a party. This was going to be her last birthday.
Emma Shepard was just an ordinary eight year old girl. Her hair was black and her eyes were blue. She liked dolls, things that were pink, and spending time with her friends. Ordinary doesn’t do justice to just how ordinary Emma was. However, that was all going to change at the end of the week. Because at that point she would become an ordinary nine year old girl.
Emma lived with her parents and her little sister Josie in a place called Harmony Hills. It was a small town, like one from a picture book, with a firehouse, a police station, a school, and a park. Harmony Hills was the sort of place where everyone knew just about everyone else.
It was the end of summer, a week before Emma’s birthday party. She always woke up bright and early, even on weekends. Emma hated wasting her day away in bed, and knew that breakfast was the most important meal of the day.
Emma had just a week before her big birthday party, and so the invitations had to go out today. Harmony Hills was a small enough town that most of her friends could be reached on foot.
As Emma was getting dressed, there was a knock on her bedroom door.
“Come in,” she said. She was mostly dressed, and finished buttoning up her shorts as her mother entered.
“Morning, Em,” Anne Shepard said. “I finished these for you after you went to bed.” She handed her daughter a bundle of sealed envelopes.
Emma took them and said, “Thanks. I was gonna head out with them after breakfast.”
“That’s fine,” her mother said. “Just don’t stay out too long.” She headed to the door and, just before she left, added, “Breakfast will be done in a sec.”
Emma sorted through her envelopes and ensured that there was one for each friend. Even with the free time that summer offers, there were few times that Emma and all of her friends could be together. It was nice that they’d all be together one last time before school started.
* * *
Emma walked out her front door, down the driveway, and onto the sidewalk. Heading to the right, Emma passed one house and walked up to her first stop, the home of the French family.
Lilly French was always quick to assure new acquaintances that French was her last name, not what type of person she was. She had brown hair and was just slightly chubbier than the rest of her friends. Lilly liked chocolate.
Lilly took the invitation with a huge smile. “Do you have one for Nick too?” she asked. Nick was Lilly’s brother, her twin and virtually a male copy of her, although the two insisted that they were nothing alike, and didn’t seem to get along.
Emma shook her head and smiled, “Girls only.” The boys of the neighborhood usually kept to themselves, and the girls were fine with that.
“What kind of cake are you having?” Lilly asked, hoping the answer was chocolate.
“It’s a surprise,” Emma winked as she took off.
Emma passed another house and made her way to a front door that she wasn’t exactly looking forward to. Emma and her sister weren’t the only little Shepards in Harmony Hills. Her cousin Abigail lived in the biggest house in the neighborhood. Emma didn’t exactly want to invite her to the party, but her parents insisted. She answered the door the way she had spent her entire life; in a nice dress with big, blond curls.
“Oh... It’s you,” Abigail said. She would frequently come off as spoiled, vain, conceited, bossy, selfish, self-righteous, arrogant, obnoxious, and mean. Abigail was constantly out to get Emma and her friends.
Emma responded with a not too expressive, “Good morning, Abigail.”
“So, what can I do for you today?” the princess asked.
Emma sighed and handed Abigail her invitation. “Would you please come to my party next week?”
“A party? With you and your little friends? I’m sorry Emma, but I’m going to be in the sixth grade this year. I can’t risk being seen with you and your juvenile friends.”
Emma took a deep breath, then said, “Great,” as she turned and walked away.
Abigail was taken aback. “Wha... Great? What does that mean?” Abigail watched as Emma ran off, and simply went back into her own home.
Emma didn’t have time to deal with her cousin. She wrapped around the cul-de-sac to the end of the neighborhood, where the last house on her journey sat.
The Gaines family was home to Penny, Emma’s best friend. Emma had fond memories from her early childhood; jumping on Penny’s trampoline, playing hide and seek in their massive basement, and dressing up in Penny’s mother’s old clothes.
However, as Emma walked along the driveway, she found herself remembering something she hadn’t thought about in a while.
As Penny was a year older than Emma, she was always a grade ahead of her and her friends. On the day Penny came home from her first day of kindergarten, she went over to Emma’s house to play. Penny acted so proud about going to real school, but seemingly killed any reason she had to boast by announcing that she also got to wear Pull-Ups that day.
Emma was dumbfounded. Penny acted like she was so lucky, and actually let everyone see her Pull-Up. Emma was rather confused, Pull-Ups were worn by toddlers. Penny was almost six! Even Josie, who was two at the time, didn’t wear them.
Looking back, it made a lot of sense. Penny had all sorts of problems when it came to the bathroom. She’d wet herself whenever they would play together and wore Pull-Ups whenever Emma slept over. When Penny was seven, Emma even saw a package of Pull-Ups on top of her dresser.
Eventually Emma stopped noticing these things, and briefly found herself looking for them. Growing up with Penny caused a bit of fascination about the topic for Emma. She had always been interested in exactly why Penny had those problems, and even wanted to try a Pull-Up on.
However, given how embarrassed Penny was about everything, Emma was always afraid to even bring it up. Emma was even too afraid to actually go through with it. She knew it was weird and just accepted it as a little weird thing about herself that she gradually forgot as she grew up.
Ignoring the bizarre memories of Pull-Ups , Emma ran the last few steps to the front door, where she found Mimi.
“Oh, hi, Emma,” Mimi said when she answered the door at.
“Hi, Mimi,” Emma said as she gathered the envelopes. “I have invitations for you and Penny for my birthday party. It’s next week.”
“Oh, wow!” Mimi said, “That’s cool. I’m sure Penny will be very excited.”
“Where is she, anyway?” Emma asked.
“I have absolutely no idea!” Mimi smiled.
Emma paused, expecting Mimi to go looking for Penny, or at least call her name. After a second of nothing, Emma gave up. “Well... See you then,” Emma waved as she stepped off the porch and headed toward the sidewalk.
Mimi was Penny’s sister, adopted from Japan at age two. She was very outgoing and eccentric. Unlike Penny, Mimi was the same age as Emma and everyone else in their group; another reason why Penny often associated with their class instead of her own.
Having made a complete circle of the neighborhood, Emma headed towards the mailbox at the end of the street. The rest of her friends were more than a short walk away, and would have to find out about the party by mail.
Heading home, Emma noticed that the “For Sale” sign on the house next door to her’s had a “Sold” banner taped over it. Emma shrugged.
It was nice out, and since summer was ending, she decided to turn around and circle back around the neighborhood before heading home. It wouldn’t be this nice forever.
Chapter 2
Emma burst through the front door and headed toward the nearest bathroom. Her orange juice from breakfast had pumped her full of Vitamin C, which was now looking for a way out. She had started to think that walking slowly and enjoying the sunny day might have been a bad idea.
But Emma had made it to the bathroom, not that there was a chance she wouldn’t. She hadn’t had an accident since she was in Kindergarten, and was able to hold it very very long periods of time. However, now that she had Penny’s past on the brain, Emma wondered what would happen if she wet herself at her age.
The last time that happened, it was the end of the school day, and she really had to go. For whatever reason she was in the kind of mood where she wasn’t necessarily afraid to ask to go to the bathroom, but simply didn’t want to. Emma sat still in her chair and regretfully let her self pee, just to avoid the feeling of a full bladder. Her teacher just thought she had been feeling sick, since Emma wore dark pants. No one could tell what had actually happened.
When her mom came to pick her up, she uncovered Emma’s accident and spent the whole car ride home giving her a potty training refresher course. It was hardly a scolding, but was less than comforting. And that was that.
Penny probably never had that problem. She could just wet her Pull-Up everyday and no one would say a thing. That was on of the advantages, in Emma’s eyes, to wearing some sort of diaper. She’d never have to get up and miss a movie or stop playing with her friends. Honestly, Emma couldn’t think of an actual reason to even be potty trained.
“Emma?” she heard her mother call from the other side of the door. “You okay?”
“Uh... Yeah,” Emma said, realizing that she had made a show of bursting through the front door, storming to the bathroom, and had been sitting there, just thinking, for quite some time. Emma flushed.
Emma washed her hands and opened the door to her curious mother.
“I just...,” Emma struggled for an answer. “Really had to go,” she added.
Emma’s mother stared for a moment, then said, “Well. Try to be more careful.”
As her mother walked off, Emma realized she’d always be too chicken to actually wet her pants. However, the thought of it was quite exciting.
* * *
Penny stared at the blurry image in the mirror. As she put on her glasses, she was able to make out the image of her pale skin, and her pale-blond hair. Other than a few allergies, Penny wasn’t exactly a sickly child, but she definitely looked like one.
Penny stepped out of her bathroom, refreshed from her shower. She loved bathing in the shower, as it made her feel refreshed and clean.
She walked down the hall and into her bedroom, where she began to get dressed. Half of Penny’s wardrobe was pale-blue. On this, a Saturday, Penny opted to put on her play clothes; simple shorts and a T shirt, both the color of the sky.
Just as Penny was done dressing, Mimi entered and handed her an envelope with Penny’s name on it.
“What’s this?” Penny asked as she neatly opened it.
“Emma brought it over for you,” Mimi said. “I got one too.”
Penny finished opening the enveloped and discovered the invitation to Emma’s birthday party, to be held at the end of the following week.
“Oh, cool,” she said as she set it down on her nightstand.
“Mom said we have to go to the store later to get her a gift,” Mimi said before dancing out of the room.
Emma was easy to shop for, as far as Penny was concerned. Her best friend was such an ordinary little girl it was almost too easy. She’d be happy with anything girly or pink.
Penny was just the same, but at least she had her uniqueness. For example, Penny didn’t like jewelry or makeup, at least not as much as other girls. It wasn’t that weird, but it was weirder than anything Emma was into.
* * *
Emma was lying on her bed, holding up a weekly ad coupon booklet from the mail. She was looking at the small diaper ad. It was just a picture of the package and a price, nothing else.
Emma hopped up and grabbed her piggie bank. After dumping its contents out and counting, Emma realized she didn’t even come close.
Not that she would ever actually go through with it. There were so many factors to consider. How would she get to the store? What if someone saw her? How would she get them back to her room? Where would she hide them? And would she even be brave enough to put them on and use them for their purpose?
Emma chuckled and put her change away. It was just happy thinking, there was no way she’d go through it.
Emma got up, put the booklet under her bed, and headed downstairs for a snack.
Emma was finishing up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich when her mother walked into the kitchen. “Emma, can you come help me at the store. We can buy some more of your party stuff too.”
Emma nodded and went to put her shoes back on. She liked going shopping. And this time, she’d be able to see the package of diapers, which always seemed to be on sale, in real life. Passing a plastic bag on a shelf was better than nothing.
Chapter 3
Penny liked the summer. She was sad that it had to end. She liked the free time they got - three whole months to play, and gorgeous weather. Sure, the summers were very hot in Harmony Hills, but the winters were just as harsh and came quicker every year.
Both seasons reminded Penny of playing with her friends. They’d practically spent every waking summer day in someone’s backyard or hanging out in the woods. Winters were different, because they only had such little time to bundle up and play before the snow melted, but that just made their time together all the more special.
“Hello! Earth to Penny!”
Penny snapped out of her daydream, Mimi was staring right at her.
“What?” Penny asked.
“Don’t you ‘What?’ me,” Mimi said, “We were having a very important conversation and you started daydreaming. Honestly, what were you thinking about?”
“Winter time,” Penny said.
“Well that’s weird,” Mimi declared, “Anyway, what costume do you think I should wear to Emma’s party?”
Penny had clearly been daydreaming longer than she thought. “Is it a Halloween party? It’s August.”
Mimi shook her head, “No?”
“Let’s go girls,” their mother said as she walked by, carrying a few bags.
Penny and Mimi followed. They left the store where they had bought Emma a birthday gift and a few other things they needed for the house.
When they arrived at the car, Mimi pointed and said, “Hey look, it’s Emma.”
Penny and traced Mimi’s finger. Across the parking lot, Emma and her mother were just entering the store that they had left.
“HI, EMMA!” Mimi shouted as her mother rolled her eyes and covered her face with her palm.
“Let’s go girls,” their mother said, “We don’t want Emma to see her present to early, do we?”
* * *
When Emma entered the store, she took a good look around. Everything was organized into aisles, making it easy enough to find what she was looking for. However, she needed to be discrete. She couldn’t just go straight to the diaper aisle. She needed to take it slowly and at least pretend to look around. And then, there was her mother and sister.
“Grab me a cart, will you, sweetie?” Anne asked as she got a list out of her purse. Emma complied, telling herself once again that there was no way she could get a chance to spend even two seconds near the diapers. Not with them around.
They made their way through the frozen food section, the snacks section, the household wares section, and the toiletries section. Even when they stopped in the party section, Emma could care less about anything else. For some reason, all she could think about was diapers.
In less than an hour, they had walked through every aisle they needed to, which did not include the baby aisle. As they approached checkout, Emma thought their time in the store was coming to a close.
And then, as her mother got in line, she turned to Emma and said, “Emma, I forgot the bread, can you go grab a loaf?”
Just like that, her mother had given Emma free range to roam the grocery store, which the only rules being that she had to return within a reasonable time and with a loaf of bread. Candy from a baby.
Speaking of babies, the diaper section was just past the bread aisle, and both were far away enough from checkout that Emma wouldn’t be caught sneaking off to questionable areas. After she grabbed a loaf, Emma made sure there was no one watching her, and then headed into the aisle, stopping just in front of the diapers.
Looking around, Emma realized that there were a lot more options than the ones in the booklet. There were the standard baby diapers, in both the Huggies and Pampers variety, plus the generic versions. They were appealing, but Emma knew that in her realistic, yet still wildest dreams, she wouldn’t be able to fit in those. And they’d probably be difficult to put on without help from someone, like her mother. And that certainly wasn’t going to happen.
The Pull-Ups were what she really wanted, they were larger and she could slip them on and off by herself. And if second grade Penny could fit in them, why not fourth grade Emma? In addition to the generic version, there were the actual Pull-Ups, and the Pampers version, called Easy-Ups.
Both Emma and Josie were potty trained with the Huggies brand, and that’s what Penny wore for all those years. There wasn’t even a real reason to consider any other option. She’d never really heard of anyone using Easy-Ups, and only knew about them because of the commercials.
Emma squatted down in front of the Pull-Ups. They were available in three sizes. With Emma being of an the average height and weight of a soon to be nine year old girl, she assumed the largest size would be the most likely one to fit.
Just as Emma was about to reach out and actually touch a pack, a small shadow appeared around her.
“What the hell are you doing?”
Emma knew who it was right away. Only one person with a voice that sounded that young would use language like that. She turned around and looked up at her worst nightmare. Standing right above her was Abigail, her most horrible cousin.
“Hi,” she said. Emma hadn’t even considered that someone she knew might see her at the store, a grave mistake.
Abigail stared, completely and utterly confused at what she was seeing. “Planning on pooping your pants later?” she asked.
Emma struggled to find a response. At first, she thought she might just try peeing and see how she liked that. Then, she realized that wasn't exactly what Abigail had asked. She couldn’t think of a reasonable excuse to be holding a loaf of bread, in the baby aisle, crouched down, looking at a pack of toddler diapers. On a sunday.
“You know what?” Abigail interrupted her cousin’s thinking, “I don’t care. Whatever you and your weird friends do is between you and the other fourth graders.”
Abigail turned and walked away, leaving Emma with a pounding chest as she stood alone in the diaper aisle.
Emma turned right around and left the aisle as well. She tried to calm herself down. She moved towards the office supply aisle, and caught a glimpse of Abigail from afar. Her cousin was with her mother, whom she clearly hadn’t told that the two had crossed paths.
Emma took off, avoiding Abigail as she made it for the checkout. She didn’t want to be in that store for another second.
Chapter 4
“I’m going over to Penny’s,” Emma said. It was a week later, just after breakfast. Emma said goodbye to her parents and, seconds later, was across the street.
When she arrived, Emma found an unusual sight. Penny was standing with not only Mimi and Lilly, which was expected, but also Nick, Lilly’s brother, and all of the boys from the neighborhood. There was Eli, the quiet type, Zack, the pushover, and Max.
“It’ll be a great way to end the summer,” Max said, “Don’t you agree, Emma?”
Emma was just walking up to the discussion, unsure what they were talking about. “Yeah,” she said. Max was kind of cute.
“Alright then,” Nick said, “Girls versus boys. Be at the playground in ten minutes.” The boys walked off into the woods. Emma smiled as she watched Max leave. He was always so polite to her, never got in any arguments, and always...
“What was that about?!” Lilly shouted. “Do you know what you just agreed to?”
Emma looked around at her friends. Lilly was furious, Penny was afraid, and Mimi was counting clouds. That could only mean one thing.
“Kickball,” Nick said ten minutes later. The eight stood on at the playground, which was mostly a massive grass field surrounded by a swingset and the like. “Classic rules, six innings, first to twenty-one, no fouls.”
Emma wished Rena was there to explain how wrong those rules were. Rena was the sportiest of their friends, and was tough enough to stand up to the boys whenever they come around, demanding to prove their manliness.
But Emma really couldn’t care. She was out with her friends, and didn’t mind getting to see Max.
“Hey, Emma?” Penny asked, “Are you excited to be in fourth grade now?”
Emma smiled, then nodded. “Long division and geography, right? I’m so scared I’m peeing in my pants any minute now.”
“Uhm, yeah,” Penny said, “And since you’ll be the oldest in the grade school, you get to do all kinds of stuff. It’s weird that you go from that to being the youngest at the middle school, but I think I’ll get by. Abigail says the real middle school part of middle school doesn’t start until sixth grade, but I think that’s just Abigail being Abigail, you know?”
Emma smiled, then nodded, her ear successfully talked off. They both turned to Lilly, who was arguing with Nick about his bullcrap rules. It took a while, but eventually they actually started playing.
It ended up being a nice way to end the summer. It was warm out, and Emma loved just being out and active. She was only slight interested in the actual game, but it was enjoyable enough.
After they all grew tired of the game, Lilly and Nick argued over who won, with everyone else relaxing around the playground.
Emma was sitting on the swings, just floating in place, while Mimi swung next to her, trying to go high enough to loop the swing set bar. After finally letting go and jumping off, Mimi landed on the ground and immediately found some grass to examine.
Giggling at Mimi’s antics, Emma was distracted to see that Max had actually sat down next to her.
“Hi,” he said.
Emma blushed, and turned silent.
“Fourth grade next week,” he said, “Nervous?”
Emma shook her head.
“Hey, Emma,” he continued, “Isn’t it your birthday soon?”
Emma nodded.
“Well,” he smiled, “Happy birthday.”
Emma had just built up enough courage to say something when she realized that she had never had to pee so bad in all of her life.
“I’ll be right back,” she said. She leapt of her swing, ignoring Max’s calls, and headed into the woods that separated the playground from their neighborhood. When she well out of their sight, she turned around and confirmed that no one was following her.
Chapter 5
Emma ran deep into the woods. She couldn’t believe that she had actually waited this long. Peeing outside wasn’t exactly her sort of thing, but it was her only option at the moment.
Looking around, Emma couldn’t exactly find a good place to squat - but then, she had a more interesting idea.
Emma was wearing a skirt, so if she stood still and simply wet her panties, nobody would be able to tell. Emma had been longing to try something of the sort.
She stood still. Emma composed herself when she decided that she was going through with it. She ensured that her skirt would not be damaged, and prepared to let go.
After spending seven years sitting down to pee, Emma found it difficult to just do it in her pants. She closed her eyes and envisioned herself sitting on a toilet, and then decided it was more fun to pretend she was in a diaper. Once that image was in her head, Emma began to feel a strange warmth spreading through her underwear.
Emma’s heart was racing. She could not believe what she was doing. Not since she was in Kindergarten had she done something like that, and certainly never on purpose.
Unfortunately, the thrill began to end when Emma realized that she really, really had to go. Her panties overflowed rather quickly, and she soon felt thing streams trickling down her legs and collecting in her now warm and wet socks.
Then, Emma heard a twig snap. Her eyes widened and she turned right around, instinctively forcing her hands between her legs.
Nick was standing behind her, far away enough that we couldn’t see the wetness in her socks, but close enough that he saw the newly formed wet spot on Emma’s skirt, that continued to grow as she held her hands there.
Emma traced Nick’s eyes down to her skirt, once spotless, now soaked in the front as her hands filled with the last of her emptying bladder.
She moved her hands. Nick stood still.
A voice, Penny’s, called out, “Emma!” and she realized that the other kids had been calling her name the entire time she had been wetting herself.
Emma looked at Nick and mouthed the word, “Please,” begging him to say nothing. Emma was dumb for even trying.
“She’s over here!” Nick shouted, “She peed her pants!”
With that, Emma took off, running in the opposite direction, toward her house. Being caught by her friends was far worse than being scolded by her mother in private.
And the thought of her mother filled Emma with fear and dread. She hadn’t thought any of this through. How did she think she was she ever going to get away with this? And what would happen when she got home? If she managed to avoid her parents, she would have to wash her clothes, by hand, in the bathroom sink, or simply throw them away.
Emma could hear Nick shouting for the others as he ran back. Tears began to roll down her eyes when she realized there was no way out of this. She would forever be the eight year old girl who peed in her pants the week of her ninth birthday.
Making it back to her front door without being seen, Emma felt somewhat lucky. She dodged one bullet, but was now walking into a whole firing range.
Emma slowly opened her door and closed it behind her. She then took extra caution heading upstairs, avoiding the steps that she knew would creak. As she made it upstairs, Emma thought she was home free. But then her world fell apart.
“Back so soon?” Emma heard her mother ask.
Stopping dead in her tracks, Emma’s heart was racing again. She was just outside of her bedroom, facing the door, as she heard her mother walk up behind her.
“You have fun?” her mother asked.
“Yeah” Emma said, “We played kickball with the boys.”
“That’s nice. Hey,” Anne reached out, “What are you hiding over there,” She placed her hand on her daughter’s shoulder and began to turn her around.
“Mom, no!” Emma’s shout rang throughout the house. She stood there, perfectly still, her shame on display for the world.
“Emma, sweetie, what happened?” Anne wasn’t in the mood to shout. There was no need to, she saw her daughters tears and knew she felt bad enough as it was.
“I just,” Emma started, “Held it for too long. I didn’t want to stop playing and I just forgot about it.”
As her daughter broke down into complete sobbing, Anne dropped to her knees and gave her a hug. “It’s okay,” she said, “These things happen.”
Anne led Emma into the bathroom, where her daughter’s crying had finally slowed down. She helped her out of her skirt and underwear, and then set the wet clothes aside.
As Emma stood there, naked from the waist down, she couldn’t help but feel like a complete baby. Josie never had accidents. She never even wet her bed. And here she was, the older sister, staring at her soiled clothes, waiting to be cleaned.
Even though her “accident” was in fact intentional, the fact that she was caught by Nick and now had to endure her mother took away any fun she might have had.
Emma’s mom started to run a bath, felt the water warm up, then switched it to a shower. Emma’s heart sank.
“Jump in,” her mother said, grabbing Emma’s wet clothes, “I’ll throw these in the wash and we won't have to tell your dad about this.”
With that, Emma was alone in the bathroom. She closed the door, then locked it. She then looked at the shower. Water shot out of the showerhead just as shame had shot out of her body.
Emma had never taken a shower before. Even at eight, almost nine, she had always taken a bath, often sharing one with her sister. Nothing was said about it between her and her mother. It was Emma’s first shower, and she’d never take a normal bath again.
Emma was far from happy. Wetting herself was nothing like what she thought it would be. It was messy, smelly, uncomfortable, embarrassing, and traumatic. She swore to herself that she would never try somthing like that again.
Chapter 6
Emma lay awake in her bed. Fresh from her new shower, she wanted to go to bed. Sure, it was barely lunch time yet, but Emma wanted to go to sleep and never wake up. Her life was over. Fourth grade was about to become a year of misery, torment, and shame. She sat up, decided to go downstairs and ask her mother to transfer schools.
Just then, Emma’s mother entered. “Hey, sweetie,” she said, “Feeling better?” Emma nodded. “I know how you’re probably feeling, but it’s best to just put these things behind us and forget all about them.”
“I guess,” Emma agreed.
“And besides,” her mother added, “I need you to run an errand for me.”
“What?”
“I need you to pick up something from Abigail’s house.”
Emma groaned. She would rather pee her pants in front of the whole school before she ever saw Abigail again.
“And wear your jacket, it’s getting chilly out there.”
Summer was over. Emma’s life was becoming filled with disappointment after disappointment.
* * *
Emma practically ran down the street toward her cousin’s house. While she was dreading being near her cousin, the less time she spent roaming her neighborhood the better. If someone from the kickball game spotted her, she would literally die.
Emma arrived at Abigail’s house, and pressed the doorbell three times.
“Back with more invitations?” Abigail asked, “Honestly, Emma you have got to take a hint; nobody wants to be your friend.”
Emma ignored her cousin’s attempt at an insult, wanting to end their visit as soon as possible. Before she had to say anything, the two were joined by Abigail’s mom, Emma’s aunt Debra.
“Emma,” she said, “Thanks for coming. We just couldn’t get out of the house and your mother was very insistent.”
Emma smiled, unsure as to exactly what she was there for.
“Well, come on in,” aunt Debra said. She led Emma into the kitchen where some woman was drinking coffee. Emma vaguely recognized her.
“Emma, you remember my sister, Gina, from Christmas?” aunt Debra asked. “She’s staying with us for a few nights.”
“Hello, sweetie,” the woman said, “You’re growing up into a lovely young lady.”
Emma smiled and thanked Gina, who turned around to Abigail and asked, “Honey, would you go check on Kathleen for me? I think she’s playing in the other room.”
Abigail ran off, and Debra said, “Let me go get that for you.”
Debra headed down to the basement. On the way, Abigail passed her by, holding Kathleen by the hand. Kathleen, now more of a toddler than the baby that Emma remembered, whispered something to her mother. As Gina scooped her up and took her into the bathroom. Abigail quickly vanished.
Emma waited a minute, and aunt Debra had still not returned. She felt herself needing to pee, and was intent on not having another accident, especially at Abigail’s house. As Gina was still in the downstairs bathroom, Emma made her way upstairs.
As she was finishing up on the toilet, Emma looked around. And her eyes widened. In a corner of the room was an opened package of Pull-Ups. Little Kathleen must be going through potty training, hence the Pull-Ups.
Not surprisingly, Emma found herself less interested in that specific detail. Someone the appropriate age wearing a diaper wasn’t exactly all that fascinating. However, Emma realized something else.
She crept over to package took a peek inside. It was half full, Gina probably won’t notice if one or two went missing.
As she heard the voices of her aunt calling her from downstairs, Emma quickly grabbed two Pull-Ups and shoved them in her jacket and ran down stairs.
“Here you go,” Debra said, handing Emma a brown paper bag. Emma took it, and then said, “Well, I better hurry back,” in reference more to her recent theft and less to her mother’s need for this random brown bag.
Emma added a “Goodbye,” and left with a smile.
Chapter 7
Emma raced home. Not because she was afraid of being caught. She had in fact completely forgotten about her half-accident earlier and was now more excited by the prospect of the Pull-Ups hidden in her jacket. She was excited, finally feeling victorious.
When Emma got home, she ran straight upstairs and into her room. There, she pulled out the Pull-Ups and set them on her bed. She stared at them with glee.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door, which startled Emma. She shoved the Pull-Ups under her pillow just as her mom entered the room.
Emma’s confused mom grabbed the brown bag off Emma’s bed.
“Oh, sorry,” Emma said, “I ran upstairs before I could give that to you.” She looked for a reason, then added, “It’s cold out.”
Anne shrugged, and pulled a carton of baking soda out of the bag. “Now I can finally start work on those cookies you want for the party.” Emma’s mother left.
For a second, Emma wondered why her aunt Debra needed baking soda. She assumed she was probably baking. Or something. It didn’t matter anymore. Nothing else mattered.
Emma had diapers.
* * *
“Wow,” Emma’s father said, “You must have been really hungry.”
Emma was eating her dinner as quickly as possible. With her evening bath replaced by her earlier shower, the next step on Emma’s agenda was to put on her pajamas. She usually went for a standard nightgown. But tonight, her wardrobe was to be expanded.
Emma decided against dessert and headed upstairs, where she locked her door, just to be safe, and then pulled her pajamas from her drawers, where she also hid the diapers after the close call earlier.
Emma undressed and put on her pink, princess-decorated nighty. It was a remnant of her childhood. Something that barely fit her anymore. It would probably pass to Josie soon, or just go to charity. It made Emma look four years younger. Appropriate attire for the occasion.
As she stood naked under her nighty, Emma stared at the Pull-Ups. One of them had Cinderella on it, the other had a trio of Princesses that Emma was less familiar with. After composing herself, Emma picked up Cinderella, and put it on.
* * *
Penny woke up. It was the day of Emma’s party. She followed her typical morning routine, undressing, showering, getting ready for the day, and then heading downstairs. After the usual morning conversations with her parents, Penny had her breakfast. Afterwards, she simply needed to find something to entertain herself until the party.
* * *
Lilly woke up. It was the day of Emma’s party. She followed her typical morning routine, heading straight downstairs in what barely counted as pajamas, plopping in front of the TV, and absorbing hours of cartoons. When there was nothing interesting on anymore, Lilly grabbed some breakfast. Afterwards, she plopped back in front of the TV. She spent the day like that, watching cartoons in her sleep clothes until the party.
* * *
Mimi woke up. It was the day of Emma’s party. She followed her typical morning routine, laying in bed and trying to get as much sleep as possible. After her bed became less comfortable and she grew restless, she slogged downstairs for some breakfast. Afterwards, she was full of energy and bounced all over the house. Penny was certainly entertained. The two spent the day together, waiting until the party.
* * *
Emma woke up. It was the day of her party. After slowly stretching her muscles, she realized that she’d have to adjust her morning routine. Beneath her nightgown was a Pull-Up, for the first time since she could remember.
She certainly enjoyed the feeling of wearing it, but Emma was way too afraid to actually pee in it. She had already come home with wet pants, and there was no way she could explain a wet diaper.
After a few minutes of enjoying the feeling, Emma got out of bed and undressed. She was careful not to split the tabs, or else she wouldn’t be able to wear it again.
She then moved to hide it with the other one. Instantly, she noticed the difference. The one in the drawer was still stiff, while the one she had worn was loose and stretched out. This was probably because they were meant for two year old Kathleen. Emma would have to get as much use out of it as possible in a few nights before it started to fall apart.
Emma dressed and went downstairs, where she found her parents setting up the party. She offered to help, but mostly stayed out of the way. When the time came, she went back upstairs and put on some nicer clothes.
After the sun went down, the doorbell rang. Emma went to answer it, stil in a good mood from her night in diapers and the coming festivities. As soon as she opened the door, her world came crashing down.
Her first guest was Abigail.
Chapter 8
Abigail arrived with her parents. In the presence of adults, Emma’s cousin was ultra-fake nice. After standard birthday party pleasantries, the two kids were left alone.
“Just so you know,” Abigail said, “I only came because my parents made me. So... Here” Abigail shoved a present in Emma’s hand.
“Thanks a lot,” Emma said, walking the present to the table. The two then stood in an awkward silence, Abigail was suspiciously out of ammo. Emma inferred that she really must not want to be here.
The rest of the guests arrived shortly after that. First Penny and Mimi, and then Lily. They talked for a bit, and Emma forgot all about Abigail.
Emma was suddenly reminded that this was her first time seeing her friends since she ran off at the kickball game. Something she’d completely forgotten about.
“So where did you go?” Mimi asked.
“Nick said you peed your pants,” Lilly said.
“Is it true?” Mimi asked.
“Yeah, is it true?” Lilly asked.
“Hi, Emma,” Penny said, softly.
Emma had them all quite down. Her father and more importantly Abigail had no idea about the accident, and she wanted to ensure that no one ever found out. Including her friends.
“Of course not,” Emma said, “I just remembered that my mom needed help buying stuff for the party and I didn’t have time to say goodbye.”
They stared at her for a second, and then found other things to worry about.
“Where’s the food?” Mimi asked.
“Do you have any chocolate?” Lilly asked.
The party went on. More friends came. There was Rena, who was on every sports team. Izzy, who was incredibly nice. And lastly there was Nicole, a girl with dark skin that sticks out at any major gathering in Harmony Hills..
“Princess is here, huh?” Nicole asked when she spotted the tell-tale high heels of a wannabe teenage drama queen.
“Come on, Nicole,” Rena said, “You’re both into dance and other girly stuff. I bet you’ll spend the rest of your lives together.”
“If I’m ever her friend, promise you’ll kill me,” Nicole demanded.
Everyone laughed, until Abigail walked by.
“What on earth is so funny?” she asked. Everyone stared in silent fear, except Nicole who stepped forward.
“Just you and your fat legs,” Nicole said.
Abigail’s jaw dropped, and she stormed off.
“You’ll have to tell me how you do that someday,” Emma said.
* * *
The party went on. They played games, ate cake, and had fun. As everything was winding down, the girls found themselves outside, in the dark, catching lightning bugs.
While Izzy and Mimi were running all over the place, Emma found herself just sitting on the back porch with Penny, looking up at the sky.
“Did you have a good party?” Penny asked.
Emma nodded. “Thanks for coming, she said.
“Is something wrong?” Penny asked.
Emma smirked. She was glad that her best friend always knew what was up. “What’s fourth grade really like?” she asked.
“It’s exactly like third grade,” Penny said. “But the school work is slightly harder and on Wednesdays you get three tacos instead of two.”
Emma giggled. “Thanks.”
“Don’t worry about it,” Penny added, “Fourth grade is just the next step in growing up.”
“What if I don’t want to grow up?” Emma asked, “What if I want to be a little kid forever, or even be a baby again?”
“What are you saying?” Penny was worried by her friends words, until Emma looked up and smiled.
“Just kidding!” Emma giggled. She grabbed her friend by the hand and ran to play with the others.
But Emma was not kidding. She truly did not want to grow up. She wanted to stay little forever, maybe even littler than she already was. All she knew was that she was going to fight it as long as she could. Next year, she didn’t even want to have a party. This was going to be her last birthday.